About Me

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Kirkland, Washington, United States
I am a child of God. I am a follower of Jesus. I am a wife, momma, daughter, sister and friend. I love good conversation and hearty laughter. A good cup of coffee is always appreciated. Most of all, I desire to bring others into an experience with Jesus. One that will shape their lives and rock their souls for Him. Geoff is my best friend and amazing husband. Parker is my handsome boy who lives in Heaven. Norah is my bright star and bringer of joy. Tori is my overcomer and peaceful warrior. I live to show Jesus' love to each person He places in my path. I pray this blog strengthens you, comforts you and encourages you and that it MOST OF ALL causes you to want to get to know Jesus in a deeper level.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Weird

I saw a tiny six week old baby boy today...I did OK, but I was kind of shaking the entire time that I was looking at him. It was weird. His mom was holding his blanket, it was a polka dot one from Dwell baby (Target), the same one that I was given for Parker, when I was pregnant. That sort of made it feel all the more weird and sting a little more too. Hopefully that's the last time that emotion happens. I'm sure it won't be...

Seeing this baby boy and meeting his mommy made me think of other weird situations that may come...

It's weird, looking at this baby, knowing that his mom probably assumed that I wasn't a mommy. It's weird knowing that Geoff and I were looked at as parents when I was pregnant, and now we are just a simple married couple with no kids. I wonder how mother's day and father's day will be this year. So weird...

It's weird to think that, whenever we get pregnant again people will probably ask if this is our first and I'll have the awkward task of saying no, or choosing to protect them from a very uncomfortable conversation (for them, not me). That's weird...

It's weird to think that my next pregnancy will be with my second child. Even though we never had the joy of raising our first, we will be parents to a second child. Even though we never were able to take our first home and show him off and be apart of "that club", we'll be having our second child. So weird...

It's weird to think about the day when people ask how many kids we have. Will I include Parker in that number? Or not? So weird...

I guess Geoff and I will just have to figure out how we will navigate these situations.

2 comments:

krissyranae said...

Rachel, I know you don't know me. I know you as a fellow NNUer. I pray for you daily, and I will add these concerns to my prayer list for you. Personally, I see you as a wonderful mother. Not many could handle such a difficult situation with as much grace as you have. Happy Mother's Day early.

mollyfrog said...

I always tell people we lost one before Gideon. Some people get a little weird, but a surprising number share their story. A lot of them have had miscarriages, but a few either had a stillborn or know someone who did. I think its my way of ministering to people.